Update # 5

Jan & Feb 2017: After the New Year everyone got back into routine, back to work and school and I had my own routine, waking up early and getting myself breakfast - I was still very swollen from the steroids.
Had stockings on every day to help with the swelling on the legs, that helped me walk better. Then when the stockings came off Natalie and Mama would massage my legs, which helped move the fluid away from my feet and lower legs and made them feel more comfortable.
We made use of the mobility scooter and went to the beach for walks along the prom, we also went out for lunch at least once a week. It was good to get out of the house and enjoy the fresh air. Over the weeks and months I have had so many visits and been really grateful there have always been flowers and cards and chocolates adorning the house.
For in January one of my best friends Sandi came over from America. It was so lovely to see her. Her suitcases were full of food that she knew I loved from America. She didn't come for a vacation for her, she worked and did what ever she could to help. On the weekend it was her birthday, but she still insisted on cooking for the whole family. It was delicious everyone loved the dinner and desserts. We celebrated her birthday with her and she was really surprised that she had gifts. Even the nieces and nephews made cards and bought her presents, she in one week become part of the family. Every night she took over the role of masseuse not only was it a comfort for me but we caught up and talked into the late night.
Natalie, Sandi and I spent a day seeing the local sights it was a beautiful day. We went  to Sandbanks and across the ferry to Corfe Castle. We were going to go to Tyneham but the tanks were shooting so the village was closed. We went to Lulworth and I got the mobility scooter out and we went all the way to the bay. After Lulworth we went to Durdle Daw and then Poundbury. We took a tour of the lovely village of Poundbury and ended at a lovely new restaurant The Duchess of Cornwall and had a delicious three course meal that we couldn't finish. It was a lovely week but so difficult to say goodbye. It brings tears to my eyes as I think of it.

February was very much the same as January but in the last two weeks my energy levels were lower, so it was more difficult to get out.
The 27th February was the last time I was able to get up the stairs to my bedroom, I was so worn out by the time I got there I could hardly get into bed. Natalie and I got quite emotional as we realised things were starting to change, quicker than we thought. I remembered that March was the sixth month after being diagnosed and they said I might only have six months left.
So we decided it was time for me to be downstairs and ask for a hospital bed.
The district nurse came the next day and she ordered a bed and it arrived that evening. What amazing service.

Update # 4

Centre Parcs & Christmas 2016: For those people that don't know Centre Parcs is a holiday village and there a a number of them throughout Europe, and 5 England.
It has been an annual Furbank Holiday the week before Christmas and this was our 27th year (for some of us - recently not everyone could do it as the children weren't allowed out of school) But this year, as it was my last everyone had permission to come and spend time with me 😊 In total there were 40 of us, as some of my cousins came too.
We went to Longleat Centre Parcs, which is only an hour away from Poole, so the Dr said I could come back to the hospital if needed.
My cousin Laura who has a chronic back condition and I needed mobility scooters so we hired them for the week to get around as Longleat is very hilly. On day one we arrived unpacked and rested. Stayed in a very comfortable in villa with all the girl cousins, it was so fun to be together. The rest of the family were in different villas but close by. We played games together and caught up as one of my cousins had just flown from America (the first time in 7 years) over especially for the holiday.
Went swimming the next day, it was really nice to float and be able to stand and walk in deep water without wobbling and falling over. It meant that I could stand and not be weary as we caught up and also played with the children. The only down side to that was when I went out I felt heavy and wobbly and assistance. Through the week I managed to go swimming three times, somethings  in the dark. The outside pool was warm and really fun with the children. I loved being able to hold the children as we looked at the Christmas lights.
On Wednesday my cousin Amy and her husband Michael arrived from America to join us.
During the week went to different restaurants, spent time with different people and enjoyed having fun times and making memories. Had pancake breakfast at Zac and Su's/Josh and Sarah Jane's.
As a thank you to the Centre Parcs staff for being so good to our family, we sang underneath the large Christmas tree in the morning plaza. We made a great sound which created crowds of appreciative passers by, I think we should have sung for longer!
Thursday night is always our last night but a special night. Where we all gather together to have Chilli, hot chocolate and sing carols in front of the fire. It was a lovely evening with 40 of us and prepared us for the Christmas season.
Back home we had a week to make final preparations for Christmas. On Monday we took Amy and Michael to Lakeside, one of our favourite Fish and Chip restaurants, it was a special evening as we've never done this before at Christmas, the staff were lovey and accommodating supplying us with crackers and Christmas hats, and a three course menu. When we got home Amy and Michael wanted to do Family Home Evening, she showed video that she'd edited videos from friends and family she'd asked to provide a Christmas message to me.
It made my evening it touched my heart, thank you everyone for making the effort. Amy had to edit them as some of them were 6 minutes long. She has sent me all the full length videos and I'm now watching them individually. What a blessing it is to have so many friends and people who have touched my life.
I enjoyed the mobility scooter so much that Zac and Su bought me one and gave it to me as an early Christmas present so I could get out and about on my own. I managed to go along for a family walk on the prom by the beach, to Poundbury Garden Centre which does a lovely Christmas display and shopping with Natalie and Fellicity.
The Friday before Christmas Auntie Maureen organised an open day for Amy and Michael in Cheltenham. She invited me to come and meet with friends, some I hadn't seen in 20 years.  It was really lovely to catch up with everybody but the goodbyes were quite emotional.
Saturday, Christmas Eve, all the family that were coming to our house for Christmas Day were assigned different components and for Christmas dinner. So I prepared the sprouts while watching Christmas movies.
Then in the evening the family came for our traditional Roast Pork supper followed by Chocolate Roulade. We all sat in front of the Christmas tree and fire as we sang Christmas songs and carols, listened to poetry, stories and scriptures. I felt really good as it's something we do every year and it's what makes me love Christmas so much. Even though it was the traditions we have every year, that I love there were occasions as I looked at the children knowing this was my last Christmas, I hoped they would remember me. I love to see the children at Christmas. Even now as I write this it makes me weep, but Mama who is typing for me reassures me that I will always be remembered because they will have pictures, tell stories and talk about me all the time.  When looking at the Christmas tree and thinking of Centre Parcs not knowing when or how long I had left or what would happen next I had these wonderful times to  comfort me and build memories for the eternities.

Christmas morning there were only five of us for opening our Christmas stockings on Mama and Papa's bed and for our traditional gammon and eggs breakfast, followed be toast and clotted cream.
I wasn't well enough to go to church or the ward Christmas carolling at the Care home.
When everyone got back we started opening our presents. Zac and Su and their two children came a little bit later followed Jared and Genevieve and theirs. I wanted to buy gifts that people would keep and remember me by. I bought books for the children. For my two sisters Natalie and Felicity I bought them the three sisters figurines as it reminded me of us. For my parents and brothers I bought a figurine holding for-get-me-not flowers. As each gift was opened there was an outpouring of love and emotion.

We had our traditional turkey dinner that is always amazing.
Those who were here were, Grandma, Jared and Genevieve and their children, Ophelia, Ephraim, Emmanuel and Indigo, Zac and Su with Megan and Oliver, and our dear friends Alan and Tracy Au.
The rest of the day into the evening we played games, ate food and had lots of fun. More Christmas traditions and memories.
The next couple of days even though Christmas Day was over the festivities continued as Ben and Kizzy and Josh and Sarah with their two, Lucas and Jonah.  arrived. Finishing with the arrival of Nathan and Abbie, Finn, Beatrix, Freddie and Poppy.
New Years Eve Natalie, Felicity and I (on my mobility scooter) went out to buy food for the New Years Eve party. We had so much fun that night, our good friends from across the road Phil and Alison joined us for silly games and food. Again my thoughts while the evening was fun had me reflecting on the New Year that was coming knowing that it would be my last year and I wouldn't make it through all of 2017.
For the New Years meal Oliver my four year old nephew was asked to bless the food, in the blessing he said 'please don't let anyone die this New Year!' There was a faint hearted Amen.